Sorry, Motel MeL does not guarantee:
|Hot Tub or Swimming Pool|
|HBO, Cable, OR Pay-Per-View|
|Sanctuary For Pimps OR Their "Clients"|
|... or anything else|
But wait! Don't leave so soon...
So check in, Kick back, and throw the "Do Not Disturb" up on the door. be as loud as you want and tell the housekeeper to leave an extra mint on your pillow.
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